LifeStar-1, the BK-117 helicopter that transported Ben.

On Monday, December 12, 2011, my world fell apart. What started out as me thinking Ben had a stomach bug quickly became more. I took him to the pedi where they became concerned about his breathing. They gave him a breathing treatment which didn't work. So, we got sent to Edward Er. His temp was 95.8 when we got there. So they treat that the same as a fever. This meant lumbar puncture, cath for urinalysis, blood gasses, chest xray, EKG, blood labs. I thought that was bad. Watching my baby go through all that. Little did I know it would get so much worse. They got him stable in the er and sent us up to picu for a mandatory 48 hr stay. I thought "ok this is hard but I can deal." well it went downhill from there. His breathing started getting worse. So they intubated him. Then his heart started looking bad in the EKG. So they did an echo and discovered it was enlarged and causing his other organs to start to fail. The cause of this, was Dilated cardiomyopathy. They were going to transfer us to Lutheran General because they have a heart lung machine, called ECMO there, and Edward does not have one for babies. Then the icu dr decided Children's Memorial in Chicago would be better in case he needed a transplant. It is the worst thing to hear the word transplant in reference to your 1 mth old! I nearly passed out. They were preparing me for him not making the 15 min helicopter ride there. He was in cardiogenic shock at that point. I started hyperventilating at the thought of losing my baby. And not even being with him since I was not allowed on the helicopter(weight limits). Joe had to support me. I couldn't breathe. The chaplain and Joe helped me out. Joe drove 100 miles an hour. We got there before the helicopter. My sister met us there. And, my mom drove in from Indiana. She got there at 8. My 2 aunts were there by 5 am. We had gotten there at 3:45 am. When he arrived here it was very touch and go. He was grey. But they got him pinked up. And stabilized him as best they could while letting us know he was very critical. So that was my Monday and Tuesday morning.